Five years ago to this very day my good friend Andre took his life.
He had gone through a particularly nasty marriage breakup and tried to mend his depression by heading north with his surfboard and dabbling in lots of drugs and booze. In hindsight it didn’t work that well.
I haven’t thought of him for ages, but the other night while I was sleeping I was awakened by a very loud banging at my front door.
I’m not too sure if I was dreaming or not, but it was Andre; exactly the same as last time I saw him.
He came in and sat down and asked me if I knew where his wife and young daughter had moved to and if I’d seen them lately.
I told him that he shouldn’t be hanging round because he’s dead.
I promptly woke up and wrote this song (thanks Khidir) in less than 20 minutes flat. (some help from the dark side I’m sure)
I’ve sung it from my friend’s point of view.
It took a bit longer recording the vocal due to the huge lump in my throat…
Here’s the words, I’ll post the pella a little later. [EDIT] Its here now.

I hold on to my ticket
I took the last train out of town
a south wind is a blowing
jacaranda flowers on the ground
I have no way of knowing
if I’m lost or if I’m found
when I think of you, I’m holding
my heart begins to pound

But why?
have I lost such such sight of things
(it lays across me darkened every chance this time of year)
I could of tried
to return the hope you bring
instead I built these walls around me
with those voices that I hear

As the train rolls into Sydney
decorations scattered round
Will you be there down to meet me
with a coat and rubber van?
With my daughter there
to greet me
with the lovn that shes found
Could we start a new beginning
above the voice of Christmas sound?

But why?
Can’t I keep this love around
Your arms were always open
I could hardly hear the sound
of your heart
as it beats in tears of hoping
I’ll be coming home for Christmas darling

I knock upon that door
that I’d painted years before
but the latch is all now broken
you’ve moved out there years ago
I walk down the hall I’m choking
past the babys room I’m hoping
I reach a fireplace burning
and hear laughs of Christmas yearning

But why?
Can’t I shake this black dog churning
I have lost so much
I’m learning
since your pages have been turning

Oh My
I’m coming home for Christmas baby whoa
I’m coming home for Christmas baby uhmm
Coming home for Christmas baby…

I write your name up in the sky
throw my bottle back to Hades
hang away that mourning suit now darling
crash and burn that black Mercedes!
Cause I’m not coming home
for Christmas this time Baby

And if you think that life is kinda strange
well the afterworld is so much crazy!
Throw a way our wedding rings
my time is here and getting hazy

what kind of fiends you keep?
don’t you cry our little girl to sleep
Its time to move along now pretty lady

I’ve been to places I have seen before
I even knocked too loud on Scomber’s door
who told me that our friends forgave me
Now I hope that god will save me

(but I haven’t seen him lately)
Have you seen him lately?
RIP ANDRE DECEMBER 19 2003