straight to the light (snowflake lifts me up mix)
Kristian
today is tuesday the 13th of december 2022. today i was slightly psychotic this morning anyway. anyway after two bottles of wine with medication i feel better.
fitting to my mood, still drunk but no longer senseless i made this christmas remix.
what else should i write?
I can’t think of anything else.
…
maybe i should have just taken more lorazepam this morning instead of shooting my head off. i always say valium to lorazepam. but lorazepam is ten times stronger than valium. and with neuroleptics and red wine, it knocks you out.
my second psychiatrist, the crazy one with the mustache, always says play with the meds, take as much as you need.
if my main psychiatrist ann katrin and my psychologist eva kathrin knew that i was also taking lorazepam, they would kick me out.
that’s why now, when the new digital medical record is introduced, i have to make sure that i don’t activate it. because with this digital card, every doctor can immediately see everything that is prescribed for me. and then i would be screwed.
in germany, benzodiazepines, including lorazepam, are among the drugs that are not prescribed for more than 6 weeks at a time. even though they are the most prescribed psychotropic drugs in germany.
junkies sell benzodiazepines on the black market.
be that as it may. tomorrow i have an appointment with the pregnant eva kathrin. i’ll tell her about the horse again and lie my way through the hour. why? because the state that finances me also consults her. but that only goes until the end of january. then she goes on maternity leave. and then i’ll have a 6-month break from lying.
my former psychiatrist irena the croatian once said that i am as strong as a bear. that my muscles have a high influence on my organism and heart because i tolerate the medication so well. if she had known that i mix my medication with alcohol two to three times a week and drink myself into near unconsciousness.
now i’m listening to my remix. i took four different chord progressions from famous pop songs.
the humming in my remix has become really good.
it has become a lullaby.
anyway.
fitting to my mood, still drunk but no longer senseless i made this christmas remix.
what else should i write?
I can’t think of anything else.
…
maybe i should have just taken more lorazepam this morning instead of shooting my head off. i always say valium to lorazepam. but lorazepam is ten times stronger than valium. and with neuroleptics and red wine, it knocks you out.
my second psychiatrist, the crazy one with the mustache, always says play with the meds, take as much as you need.
if my main psychiatrist ann katrin and my psychologist eva kathrin knew that i was also taking lorazepam, they would kick me out.
that’s why now, when the new digital medical record is introduced, i have to make sure that i don’t activate it. because with this digital card, every doctor can immediately see everything that is prescribed for me. and then i would be screwed.
in germany, benzodiazepines, including lorazepam, are among the drugs that are not prescribed for more than 6 weeks at a time. even though they are the most prescribed psychotropic drugs in germany.
junkies sell benzodiazepines on the black market.
be that as it may. tomorrow i have an appointment with the pregnant eva kathrin. i’ll tell her about the horse again and lie my way through the hour. why? because the state that finances me also consults her. but that only goes until the end of january. then she goes on maternity leave. and then i’ll have a 6-month break from lying.
my former psychiatrist irena the croatian once said that i am as strong as a bear. that my muscles have a high influence on my organism and heart because i tolerate the medication so well. if she had known that i mix my medication with alcohol two to three times a week and drink myself into near unconsciousness.
now i’m listening to my remix. i took four different chord progressions from famous pop songs.
the humming in my remix has become really good.
it has become a lullaby.
anyway.